My Mother’s Mother
Donna Dean Baldwin {Jones}
August 8, 1925 ~ September 20, 2000
{This photo was taken sometime in 1941. Grandma would have been around 16.}
I can’t explain the importance of being mothered. When my own mom died in 1991, it was a natural progression for my grandmother to step in as a maternal figure. We lived next to Grandma until I was in high school, so she was the woman I gleaned the most from during my formative years.
She nurtured me along as I grew, offering guidance and an honest opinion when she saw fit (whether I wanted it or not). She shared stories about Mom and celebrated birthdays and milestones with me. When she approved of me, it felt like Mom approved of me too. It was what I needed, to be affirmed as a daughter by the woman who had known my mother the most.
By the time I graduated from high school in June 1999, Grandma’s cancer had made her body weak. I still have the graduation card she gave me. In it she penned how proud she was of me and shared her regret in being unable to throw a big graduation party for me. Through the years, she had been there for the moments when I needed a mom, but now that was changing.
A little more than a year later, on September 20, 2000, Grandma passed from this life into the next. Once again, I felt utterly alone. Being around Grandma was the closest I felt to Mom while growing up. Losing my mother’s mother was like losing the last small connection I had with my own mother.
Maybe our bond wouldn’t have been so strong or special if it hadn’t been affected so deeply by loss. But regardless, Grandma was the woman who mothered me through the hard years that followed Mom’s death and I am forever grateful that she chose to be there for me. There are days I miss her dearly. Today is one of those days. She wasn’t here long enough and neither was Mom. But I am thankful for the memories we were able to make and for the legacy they left me with. I can only hope that if they were here today, they would be proud of the woman that I have become.
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